8 years ago I developed a habit that I can’t break. My addiction to cornstarch started when I was pregnant with my 2nd child. I didn’t just walk into the store and go down the baking isle and pick up a box of cornstarch though. My favorite scent is baby powder. I loved the scent so much that I started eating baby powder because sniffing the bottle just wasn’t doing it for me anymore. Along with eating baby powder I would eat packs of tropical punch Kool-aid…(WEIRD) After doing this for a month or so I started to feel sick because of all of the stuff that was in baby powder. I stopped eating the baby powder and just stuck to the Kool-aid packs, but something was missing. I needed another powdery substance. Flour was to lumpy and tasted weird, so the thing next to it was CORNSTARCH!! Y’all, this is one of the hardest things to shake. When my family found out I was eating it they would pour liquids into my bowl or pour the whole bowl in the trash. I started hiding my starch when they would come over and when I went to their houses I would hide the starch in the car. Fast forward to today….THIS IS STILL MY LIFE
When we travel I sneak to the store and buy everything I need to cook up a batch of starch. Yes, I said COOK. When I first started eating the starch I could just put 4 packs of tropical punch kool-aid in the box and eat it straight out of the box. NOW there is a whole production that happens before I eat it. Ok, so my supplies are a plastic bowl, a plastic spoon, 8 packs of tropical punch Kool-aid, 4 brown paper bags and of course A BOX OF CORNSTARCH! I pour the starch and the Kool-aid into the bowl, shake it up, pour the mixture into the brown paper bags and pack it down really tight, microwave for 2 minutes and 40 seconds, let it cool for an hour then I pour it back into the bowl to devour. This whole process is to make the cornstarch crunchy! That is the only way I can eat it. I can go through a box a day and If I’m home all day I can go through 2 boxes. I NEED HELP!!! This is a true addiction because as I am typing this my mouth is watering. I actually crave it all day everyday. If I am out of it and it is the middle of the night I will get up out of my bed to go buy more. I originally just bought one box at at time but the more started to consume the more I bought at at time. Now I will buy 4 or 5 boxes at a time and that will only last for a few days. When I’m stressed I consume more. I am dying because it has been 4 days since I have had any.
I started to look up videos on how to stop eating it and I ended up searching for videos on how to make it crunchier..(RIDICULOUS) I really want to stop but the reality of it is my cravings make it difficult for me to just stop cold turkey. The longest I have gone on my “this has got to stop” run is 2 months. After that 2 months I passed by the baking isle and I was back on. The issue is when I go days without eating it I binge when I finally get my hands on some. I’ve done research and read about “pica”, I’ve read that my iron may be low and that I’m anemic…The list goes on. What I haven’t read about is HOW TO STOP?? How do I stop?? I know eventually it will make me sick but its hard to stop….Send some help my way!
My name is LaPorcia Mann and I am addicted to cornstarch…..