Before I dig into what I think marriage is, I just want to apologize for the hiatus! I haven’t blogged in awhile because I was super scared that the content I was putting out was something I only cared about. Nowadays people don’t really care about what you have going on personally, they want to be entertained and or read something that can give them an instant feel good fix. I had to reevaluate some things and remind myself who I was…SO HEEEEEY YALL!! She’s back….
Ok so lets get into it. I know I have only been married for a few months but I have been doing a great deal of reading and thinking. We hear people talk about the beautiful part of marriage, but the ugly parts sometimes get lost. I jotted down a few things that I have experienced so far (I’m no marriage expert but this is my personal opinion on my marriage). Over the next few weeks I am going to break down(in my opinion) 2 or 3 “Marriage Is” phrases. And if you think I’m wrong or I haven’t been informed please don’t hesitate to let me know because I am still learning and I’m open!!… Here are the first 2.
- Marriage is unpredictable: Each day is different for me. Some days I wake up and I’m so head over heels in love and everything is cotton candy and rainbows. The birds are doing their good singing on these days, kids are like little angels, my husband wakes up and all of the shoes he left in the middle of the floor are put away neatly in the closet, we already have dinner planned out, I mean y’all the day is just flawless….Most of my days are like that, but oh when it rains….HELP ME! Some days we both wake up on the wrong side of the bed. I’m cranky, laundry isn’t done, Ace is working on all my nerves, the kids are arguing about STUPID stuff, and I’m in full out panic mode. This is a bit of an issue for a control freak. Being a control freak in a marriage is something I may as well hang up. I wanna know, when its happening, how its happening, why its happening, and I need all of those answers before I can proceed with ANYTHING. Ace is more than patient with me, but some days he is like MA’AM would you calm down and shut UP! “You can not control everything that happens.” Each day is different. One week we have our whole future planned out and we take the necessary steps to make sure we reach that goal then BOOM…the car breaks down then ALL of the bills come out of the account all at once and the account is in the negative.(HOW SWAY)..I have heard people say that communication is KEY and y’all are so right. I think we are on the right track because we try to talk about any and everything even if it is uncomfortable. We have our days where we are 100 percent about our trust for one another and we are in Lala land then BOOM… My insecurities kick in.(we all have them) I try sooooo hard not to let my emotions get the best of me, but this is a learning process and I am human. It’s more me than Ace though. He is pretty cool when it comes to a lot of things but I will pop all the way off and have to come back and apologize for overreacting. (I blame eve because it only gets bad once a month).
2. Marriage is unconditional love: I was watching a movie and my baby girl walked in the room and heard someone on the T.V say unconditional love. She looked at me with a puzzled look and I could tell her little mind was racing. Before she could even ask I already thought about my answer. She said “Mama I think I love this boy in my class”. She said I love him with unconditional love(I was thinking to myself girl you don’t even know what love is) So I asked her “Would you still love him if he had boogers in his nose?” “EWWWWWWW mama NO”…I cracked up laughing and told her that she couldn’t possibly love him unconditionally then. Although I am a newlywed, I fully understand what unconditional love means. Not only loving your spouse when they are at their best spiritually, physically and emotionally, but loving them when they are at their lowest point. Loving them with all or their insecurities and baggage. For me we are loving each other through these things, because although we have these issues and accept each other for who we are, we still have to grow.
3 months down and a lifetime to go…..